Kakashi-sensei Needs A Date!
by phoenix545
Summary: Team seven has decided that Kakashi-sensei needs a date!
1. Chapter 1

**Warnings: attempt at humor, characters maybe OOC.**

Chapter 1: Team Mission

Team seven noticed something about their sensei. It was the first day of February and couples scattered the streets of Konaha looking for a gift for there specific other. Ever since the first day, the sensei become glump. Just sad goo. Even though he tried to hide it. The team felt bad.

"We need to do something!" Sakura whispered.

"Like what?" asked Naruto.

"I don't know! Anything! We just need to make him happy again!"

"How do you propose we do that?"

"Get him into a relationship?" Sasuke added in. The two other genin looked at him like he said the most horrifying thing in the entire world.

"Are you crazy?!"

"Who would date that pervert?!" Sakura then thought about it.

"Well...Sasuke maybe getting on to something..."

"What?! Nobody will ever date him!" the blonde piratically shouted.

"Shh! He might hear us!"

"Okay, okay!" Naruto thought about it as well "Y'know, it couldn't be such a bad plain. Isn't love suppose to make you happy or something like that?" the other too nodded.

"So...it's a mission." Sasuke said, Sakura and Naruto nodded.

"Our mission is too get Kakashi-sensei a date!" the pink haired girl put her hand out "All in favor in participating in the mission put your hand in the middle!" the two boys did.

"Alright lets do this!" shouted Naruto who got smacked in the back of the head by Sakura for being too loud.

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 **thank you all for reading:)!  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Warnings: attempt at humor, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 2: The Perfect Victo-Date!

The team strolled down the streets looking for the perfect date for Kakashi-sensei. Though, it was harder than it sounded. Everyone in the jounin's age group was either married or in a relationship.

"Maybe we should go down a few years." Sakura suggested.

"Wait...how old is Kakashi-sensei again?" the other two seemed to ignore the blondes question.

"Who do we know is a few years younger than Kakashi-sensei?" the girl thought about it for a few moments.

"Iruka-sensei?" Sasuke said. That's when Naruto's eyes went as big as the moon. Protective mode was activated.

"Yeah! He could be perfect!" the girl smiled.

"No! No way! Not happening!" the blonde said while making an x with his arms.

"Aww come on Naruto! Do it for Kakashi-sensei!"

"There is no way I'm letting that perverted jounin anywhere near my sensei!"

"Naruto!"

"Forget it! Find someone else!"

"Izumo-sensei?" Sasuke said.

"No, he's already in a relationship with Kotetsu-sensei." Sakura answered.

"Genma-sensei?" now Sasuke was just randomly saying names from memory since nobody seemed to fit the picture better than Iruka-sensei.

"He's with Raidou-sensei." all three of them sighed.

"Wow, this just proves how much our sensei has been missing out. Does he even like anyone?" again, Sakura ignored his question. She clapped her hands, smiling happily.

"Well! I guess Iruka-sensei it is!"

"No!"

"Naruto, this about making Kakashi-sensei happy again. This might be the only way!"

"Ah lets just get him a new porn book or something instead."

"Please Naruto!" Sakura pleaded.

"No!" the blonde answered sternly.

"I'll buy you ramen."

"You think I would honestly fall for that? Iruka-sensei's innocence is much more important than a hot bowl of delicious ramen!" the girl was really surprised by the very unselfish answer.

"Please Naruto!" she retreaded back to begging. At some point, somehow, the blonde finally gave in.

"Alright fine! Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei can date!" Sakura cheered in victory. Naruto crossed his arms and gave a pout "But I'm not happy about it!"

"Now the next part of the mission is to get their opinions on each other. We'll need to ask them both how they feel about each other before we do anything crazy." Sasuke said. The other two nodded in agreement. That's when the second part of the mission began to take place.

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 **thank you all for reading:)!  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Warnings: attempt at humor, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 3: Iruka-sensei's Opinion About Kakashi-senei! Ouch...

Naruto and Iruka sat at the ramen stand while Sasuke and Sakura hid up in the trees observing. The brunette felt like something was wrong with blonde. The teacher was innocently walking home from a long day of work when the kid came out of know where asking him to go to ramen. It's not that the blonde hasn't done this before, but this time seemed different. He's barely even eating his first bowl! Plus he's too fidgety. What's going on?

"Why is he acting so nervous?" Sakura whisper hissed, Sasuke shrugged. Both were sweating nervously, hoping he wouldn't blow their cover. If the brunette found out about what they were doing they might never get the two sensei's together! The pressure was driving him crazy!

"So Naruto, how are you? Are you feeling alright? Everything going well with training?" the teacher asked.

"A-a-ah! Y-yeah! E-everything's going g-great! H-how was day? W-what's your opinion on Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto didn't mean to blurt it out! Though by the time he realized his mistake, it was too late to think of an excuse. Iruka's eyes went wide, Sakura let out a sigh, and Sasuke face palmed himself.

"My...my opinion on Kakashi-sensei?" the brunette repeated, shocked. Well, it was too late to lie now without being discovered so might as well just go along with it!

"Y-yeah!" Iruka raised an eyebrow.

"Why?" sweat started to drip down the younger boys face, feeling the fiery eyes watching him from the trees and the pressure of his sensei's eyes weighing down on him.

"O-oh y'know! Just out of curiosity!" that's when the chunin closed his eyes, sat forward, and crossed his arms over his chest. If you knew what that pose meant with Iruka-sensei, which Naruto did, it meant you were about to have your pride torn.

"Well I wouldn't say he's my favorite person. All he does is tease me because I'm a chunin. Like please get over yourself." Naruto sweated harder "How can he be so famous anyway? All I see is a...a crazy person who somehow became the famous copy-nin!"

"Ouch..." Sasuke said from the trees.

"I won't go into much detail, but I don't like him, not one bit. I don't even want him near me." Iruka said glancing over at Naruto who.

"O-oh...I-I see! A-alright then...! I've gotta get going sensei! See ya later!" the boy hopped up out of his seat. This is going to be a lot harder than planned.

* * *

 **thank you all for reading!  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**Warnings: attempt at humor, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 4: Kakashi's Opinion On Iruka-sensei!

"Well, that completely back fired." Naruto mumbled with his hands behind his head while walking down the streets. "They hate each other!"

"Correcti on." Sasuke corrected "Iruka-sensei hates Kakashi-sensei. We still don't know how Kakashi-sensei feels about Iruka-sensei."

"After what Iruka-sensei said...I'm a little afraid..." Sakura whispered. The two boys nodded. Naruto suddenly clapped his hands together happily with a grin.

"Oh well! Looks like they weren't meant to be together! Lets just forget this whole idea!" Naruto said.

"No! We haven't even got Kakashi-sensei's opinion!" argued the pink haired girl.

"What if they both hate each other?!"

"Will think of something!"

"When did we become matchmakers?!"

"Shut up!"

But really, how are they going to be good matchmakers? Lets see, they've got a girl who thinks she knows everything about love, an idiot, and a emo. Great material for love!

"Alright, alright! Who will we get to ask Kakashi-sensei?" they're heads slowly turned to Sasuke who was no longer paying attention.

"Hm?"

* * *

"So...Kakashi-sensei...how was your day?" Sasuke asked awkwardly while they sat at the ramen stand after training. Like the other day, Naruto and Sakura sat up in the trees. The jounin looked suspiciously at the boy beside him. Sasuke treating him to dinner? Okay, what's going on.

"Good I would have to say." was what he answered with.

"That's...nice..." the blacked haired boy went through topics in his head to talk about "Have you...read any good porn lately?" the two in the trees almost died. What was Sasuke thinking?! Kakashi looked at him.

"Why yes I have. It was quite the story really, you see-"

"Yeah, I don't want to hear the details..." the boy interrupted.

"Oh...okay..." the jounin said "If you don't mind me asking Sasuke, but why would you treat me to lunch? Anything on your mind? Problem or something?"

"Yes, there actually is, I-"

"Maa, now dear boy," Kakashi placed one hand on his shoulder, looking at him "That's happens to all boys at some point, no need to worry though, just cover it up with a book or something. It may feel uncomfortable at first but-"

"No! No! Nothing like that!" Sasuke panicked, shrugging the hand off his shoulder.

"Oh..." Kakashi rubbed the back of his head nervously. "So, what is it?"

"I need your opinion on someone."

"Umm, who?"

"You know the academy teacher Iruka-sensei right?"

"Him? Yeah, you want my opinion on him? Why?"

"Just wondering." Kakashi thought about it for a moment.

"Well, he's definitely not on my list of friends. He's got a nasty temper and is too proud. Annoying really." Sasuke, and the others slumped slightly in disappointment. They'll never end up together. They both obviously hate each other. It's hopeless now. They should just drop the mission. They'll just have to find some other way to make their sensei happy. "However," the words startled Sasuke for a moment, making him look at the older male and the two in the trees leaned in to hear, the jounin leaned his cheek onto the palm of his hand, looking at nothing, gazing off "I have always been interested in him, but I know he doesn't like me. The first time we met I said something I shouldn't have. He didn't like me before, though, that made him completely hate me. Still, I would really like to get to know him better." the boy didn't know what it was in his sensei's eyes, but there was something. He gave a smirk, getting the information he needed. Kakashi looked at him "Is that all you need?"

"Yes, well, I have to get going. Bye sensei." the black haired boy said, getting out of the chair, about to walk away.

"Alright, see you tomorrow for training." Kakashi watched the other boy walk away "Oh, and Sasuke." the jounin said making him stop and look over his shoulder.

"If you ever need someone to explain what goes on down there, you can always come to me. I'm kind of an expert by now."

"I'm sure you are." Sasuke said before walking away.

* * *

 **thank you all for reading:)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 5: First Plan!

"Oh did you see it~" Sakura said dreamily as they walked to training "Kakakshi-sensei likes Iruka-sensei, but is to afraid to say! How romantic!"

"Why would Kakashi-sensei be afraid to tell Iruka-sensei?" Naruto mumbled, hands behind his head.

"Well...isn't love terrifying?" the pink haired girl thought about the reason.

"How should be know?! We're twelve!" Sakura punched the blonde over the head.

"Shut up!"

"It's the truth though!"

"I know! Now shut up!"

"We should try to think of something before we get to training." Sasuke said "I've actually got an idea, but it may not be the best." the two listened closely.

* * *

Kakashi was walking down the street with book in hand. On his way to train his students. He was already three hours late so what was the point of rushing? Suddenly, out of know where, an Icha Icha Paradise fell from the sky right in front of him, catching the jounin's attention. He looked at the book for a second before trying to pick it up, only for it to move away, he tried again, same thing.

"This is...sad..." Naruto whispered as they watched from the trees. Sasuke was holding the fishing poll that held the book.

"I know, I didn't think he would fall for it." Sakura agreed. The older man was determined to get the Icha Icha, no matter what. Sasuke was spacing out before snapping back into reality, only to loose his balance and fall off the tree. The girl was able to save the poll, though, not her friend. Kakashi didn't seem to notice however, too busy acting like a lion chasing it's prey.

"I'm sorry Sasuke!" Sakura whispered before snapping back to the scene in front of her. Oh no! The jounin was about to get the book! She quickly reeled it away. They jumped to another tree, after Sasuke told them to leave him behind, he was done for. In the next tree, everything seemed to be going great, Kakashi was still following the book, everything will be falling into place. That was, until a squirrel eyed the pink haired girl before pouncing and scratching at her face. She held back a scream and jumped out of the tree, trying to fight off the furry beast. Naruto gulped, holding the poll. It was all up to him now.

 _'Wait...where are we going again? What was the plan?!'_ he began to panic _'Shitshitshitshitshitshitshit! Dammit! This was all Sasuke's plan! Now, now, calm down Naruto, just lead him to some random place or, or maybe Iruka-sensei's? Yeah, yeah! That's work!'_

The blonde jumped from the tree to another. Now the streets were a little more crowded with people, but the jounin didn't seem to care of how much of an idiot he looked like. Then, something went wrong with the poll. He had to reel it up so it was off the ground, when he tried to lower it, it got jammed! He couldn't lower it of reel it in! Kakashi was on all fours, looking like a cat about to pounce on his prey, with sharp eyes.

Iruka was holding, piles, and piles of papers to be graded, so big they pretty much covered his face. he stopped when he saw something that appeared to be floating in front of him. He didn't even have a chance to think about what it was before BAM!

Kakashi pounced, able to get the Icha Icha causing Naruto to fall face first from the tree. The jounin didn't even realize he was on top of of a very confused sensei too busy loving over his praise. He looked at the cover and eyes darkened. This wasn't even a real Icha Icha! It was just a card bored cut square with a very good drawling of the original book!

"What the h-" Iruka-sensei punched the silver haired male so hard he went flying. Like his papers did when the other tackled him! Now he has to pick all of them up! Crazy ass jounin!

"What the hell is your problem?!" he shouted at the silver haired male who was slumped against the fence with most likely a broken jaw. The chunin started ranting to the jounin, letting out every bit of anger. Naruto watched, sweating nervously.

"Maa," Kakashi rubbed his jaw, looking at the other in front of him "For a man," he said "You sound like your on your period." Iruka's face went extremely red with anger. Naruto tip-toed away before things got anymore ugly.

* * *

 **thank you all for reading:)!  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 6: First Ones A Fail! Maybe Second One Is The One!

Well, in the end of the first plan, Sasuke broke his arm, Sakura got scratches on her face, and Naruto got bruises and a busted lip from being beat up by an angry Sasuke and Sakura for making the situation even worse!

"Maybe we should just give up then!" the blonde volunteered, flaring arms.

"Give up what?" they jumped at the voice. The three turned around, to see their sensei standing there with, of course his book in hand.

"O-oh hey Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura laughed nervously. The older male looked from his book at his team.

"Wow, you guys look terrible." he noticed all the injuries, well, Sasuke was poking his limb arm. The jounin raised an eye "Sasuke...what are you doing?"

"My arms broken." he muttered the obvious, still poking his arm.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"...you should fix that." Kakashi said, pointing. "Anyway, what happened to you three?"

"You don't look so good yourself." Naruto mumbled, looking at the bump under the mask. Kakashi rubbed the swollen area softly, closing his eye and sighing.

"I'd rather not talk about it." the three nodded as well. Not wanting to discuss their injuries either.

* * *

"Well, anybody have an other ideas?" Naruto asked, layind in the grass in their normal training area. Waiting for their sensei who was three hours late again! Everyone remained silent for a moment before Sakura popped her head up, eyes going wide.

"I think I do, hopefully this one will go better than the last." the two boys listened.

* * *

 _'I'm so dead! I'm so dead! I'm so so so so so so so so so dead!'_ those were the thoughts of the two poor boys who were running for their lives. Sasuke was holding the jounin's precious sin book in the one hand, the other was safely rapped in a cast, while Naruto was holding the chunin's paperwork he needed. They couldn't even hear their thoughts anymore, over their heart beats and the grim song of death.

Sakura stood patiently waiting for the two to arrive. The plan was, Naruto would ask Iruka-sensei out to lunch with him and her, Sasuke would do the same, only would say to go to lunch with their team. Then the two will meet and hopefully talk, setting aside the hatred for each other. She smirked, her plan was perfect! _  
_

"Naruto Uzumaki! Stop this foolishness!" a familiar voice shouted to her right.

"Sasuke! You emo brat! Wait until I get my hands on you! I'll be sure to break that other arm!" another familiar voice shouted to her left. Her face dropped, that wasn't part of the plan! What were those idiots doing?! Naruto ran down the street and so did Sasuke, with the sensei's close on their tails. As they ran, they didn't seem to notice each other, and Sakura didn't have time to warn either of them. Sasuke and Naruto, made eye contact, but it was too late, both collided with sickening cracks. That gave the sensei's an opportunity to catch up with them, but, when they got close, the boys disappeared with a flash of smoke, leaving only the pink haired girl to explain what had happened.

* * *

 **i really am enjoying writing this story XD i may even update another chapter today, but no promises!  
**

 **anyway,**

 **i hope you all enjoyed this chapter and i hope to see you in the next:)!**

 **thank you all for reading:D!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 7: Is Third Time Really A Charm?

Sasuke and Naruto ended up with a broken collarbone and a broken jaw from being punched in the face a very angry pink haired girl.

"What were you morons doing?! I said ask them to lunch! Not get chased to death by them!"

"But Iruka-sensei said no! I didn't know what else to do!" the blonde shouted in his defense.

"Yeah, same with Kakashi-sensei."

"So you two felt it was necessary to take their things and almost die?!" the two didn't respond "Yeah! That's what I thought! And thanks to you two, I had to come up with some bullshit excuse when they asked me what the hell you two were doing!" Naruto and Sasuke let out a sigh.

"They say love hurts, but were really the only ones getting hurt." the blonde mumbled, falling onto his back, looking at the sun. Sasuke nodded in agreement.

"This is off topic, but does anyone have any ideas? I've run dry." asked the black haired boy. Sakura shook her head.

"Me too, I can't think of anything."

"Why not just let Kakashi-sensei tell Iruka-sensei how he feels." Naruto suggested.

"We all know that's probably never gonna happen, and then Kakashi-sensei will just be lonely." Sakura sighed "What are we gonna do?" they stayed quiet, when Naruto popped up.

"Wait! I've got an idea!" he said with a devilish smirk.

* * *

Kakashi looked at his team, they looked back, Kakashi looked at his team, they looked back, Kakashi looked at his team, and, they looked back. He cleared his throat.

"So, Naruto, Sasuke, mind telling me what happened the other day?"

"Oh forget about that!" the blonde laugh "We have some more important things to ask sensei!" the jounin raised an visible eyebrow.

"Really?"

"Yep! Like for instance, do you like chunin?" Sakura asked.

"Preferably ones with brown hair, tan skin?" Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

"And is probably one of the best sensei's in the entire world and is much better than you." Naruto added in. It took a Kakashi a minute.

"Wait a second," he put down his book "Are you kids assuming that I like Iruka-sensei?"

"N-no! I-I mean-!" the girl tried to defend them, but didn't know what to say.

"Well, I don't, so you three can throw that thought out of your little minds." they all gave him a look. "What? It is the truth!" they still gave him a look. It was so obvious he was lying.

"I thought you were suppose to be good at covering up the truth sensei." Sasuke said bluntly. Before the jounin could say anything to defend himself, the blonde let out a cry of aggravation.

"Ahhhh! This is taking too long! Let down the trap!" the two nodded. Kakashi didn't even have time to think before a net was cast down from the trees, swooping him up, and hanging him upside down in a very awkward. He let out an angry growl. The space was very limited, so he was unable to reach for his weapon pouch or even move for that matter. Naruto pointed a finger at his sensei "Admit that you like Iruka-sensei!"

"Really? This is what this is about? Let me down!"

"Admit it!"

"Naruto, I swear to Kami if you don't-"

"Admit it!"

"Naruto!"

"Admit it!"

"Dammit! There is nothing to-"

"Admit it or you we won't let you out!"

"Well it looks like I'm staying in here for a long time aren't I?!" Naruto let out a growl, but it then turned into a smirk.

"I didn't want it to have to come to this." he said turning his back to the silver haired male "Though, it appears you leave us no choice." he signaled Sasuke who pulled out something from his pocket. Kakashi looked closely to see what it was. "We've researched every possible spoiler for the books you read." Naruto said slowly "So," he turned around "Admit you like Iruka-sensei or we'll read all the spoilers! Starting with your favorite book! Icha Icha Paradise!" the jounin's eyes went as big as full moons.

"Nooo! Nooo! Please! Anything but that!" tears started running out of his visible eye and he was shaking his head harshly. His hands were to far behind his back to cover up his ears!

"Admit it then!"

"Noo! Please!"

"Fine then, Sasuke," his voice turned dark "Read the spoilers." the boy nodded, but didn't even get a chance to open his mouth.

"Alright! Alright! I admit it! I really like Iruka-sensei!" the jounin cried.

"Do you mean it?" Sakura asked as she held the net.

"Yes!" the blonde raised an eyebrow.

"Sakura, drop the net." Naruto ordered, she nodded, letting the rope go, causing the net the fall along with their sensei in it. Kakashi fell on top of his head. He hissed, leaning against the tree trunk, rubbing his head. "You better be serious Hatake." the blonde warned.

"I am! I've like him for years." Kakashi admitted.

"Years?" Sakura asked shocked "Why didn't you tell him sooner then?"

"Because he hates me!"

"Exactly!" Naruto was hit upside the head by both Sakura and Sasuke.

"More importantly, why do you kids care?"

"Because we've noticed you have been really sad lately sensei, and just wanted to make you happy again. We thought this was the only way." Sakura said. Kakashi was very touched. He chuckled.

"I'm touched, I really am, but I can handle this on my own."

"Clearly you can't!" Naruto blurted "How old are you? Forty? Fifty? And you haven't done anything!" Kakashi felt like someone just stabbed him in the chest.

"I'm not that old!" he shouted "But I'm not taking love advice from twelve year old's!"

"Well, you're kind of a twelve year old in love too." Sasuke said, Kakashi sighed.

"That's true...I haven't felt this way about anyone in a long time." his mind began to wonder "Oh who am I kidding? It's pointless, he'll never like me." the jounin has never felt so much pain from saying words. The three stayed silent. Sakura smiled, putting her hand one her shoulder.

"Don't worry sensei, we'll help you. We may just be kids but we'll do our best, and so will you!"

"Yeah!" Naruto shouted, even if he wasn't still happy about it. Sasuke nodded. Kakashi had to think about it for a moment.

"Fine, I except your help." the three cheered. He knows he's going to regret this. After the cheering was over with, it went silent for a few minutes. Then Sasuke spoke.

"Oh, by the way, I don't mean to kill the mood or anything, but, me and Naruto broke our collar bones yesterday and still haven't gotten treated. We need to go to the hospital."

* * *

 **hahahaha i think im funnyXD  
**

 **anyway,**

 **i hope you all enjoyed this chapter and i hope to see you in the next:)!**

 **thank you all for reading:D!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 8: The Instincts

After Sasuke and Naruot's fun adventure to the hospital, the team sat down with their sensei to discuss how to put their second part of the mission into action.

"But how will we get them together!" Naruto asked "When Iruka-sensei hates someone, it's almost impossible for him to change his mind!" he shouted, flaring arms.

"Will think of something." the girl deadpanned.

"But what..." Sasuke whispered. The three fell into thinking positions. Kakashi-sensei had went on a mission a few hours ago and won't be back until tomorrow. They had to have something before he came back! Though, there ideas have run completely dry.

* * *

Kakashi hopped through the window the next day into office to hand in his mission report. Iruka was busy stamping and cringing at reports behind the desk. Nobody else appeared to be in the room besides them. The silver haired male was standing there admiring the view. Iruka looked up, seeing the jounin staring off into space.

"Here to hand in a report Kakashi-sensei?" the older male finally snapped out of his trance. Eye curving into a 'U'.

"Why, yes indeed." when he lifted his arm to hand in the paper, there was a sharp pain. He hissed, dropping his report and holding his arm. That's when, the most dreaded thing came out of Iruka. His motherly instincts. Of course he didn't call them that, but other people did, and Kami did he hate that instinct. It was something that he's always possessed. The brunette stood up and walked over to the jounin, taking the arm in pain softly, investigating. There was a deep cut that was deep and was still kind of bleeding. He sighed.

"You should go to the hospital. This is very bad." the jounin hid his fear of the word "hospital".

"Maa, no need for that sensei. I'll just be on my way." he was about to walk out when a hand caught him by the wrist.

"Wait, if you won't go to the hospital then...I'll treat you." that really shocked Kakashi. The chunin offering to help him? Not that he had a problem with it. Iruka wanted to die so badly. His brain was telling him no but his instincts always took control.

"Um, I guess. If you don't mind that is." Iruka shook his head.

"Not at all. Take a seat over there while I get the materials." Kakashi nodded, going over to one of the other chairs in the room.

* * *

"Oh Kami please let this be over with soon. I hurts so bad. Please hurry I'm not sure how much longer I can go on." Kakashi hissed out, eyes screwed shut, teeth gritted together tightly. The chunin sweated.

"Kakashi-senesei."

"Yeah?" he asked breathless.

"I haven't applied the alcohol, nevertheless even opened the jar." the silver haired males eyes popped open to see if the other was telling the truth. He sadly was. Kakashi laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his head with his other hand. Iruka sighed, opening the jar and taking the cotton swab dipping it in a little. "Now this may sting a little, hold your breath and try to think of something else." he felt like he was talking to one of his students. Kakashi nodded, looking away. A stinging/burning feeling hit his opened wound. The jounin hissed.

"I thought you said it would only hurt a little." Kakashi mumbled with a pout, looking at the chunin who was putting away the cotton swab.

"I said it would only sting a little." Iruka corrected, bringing out the needle and thread. The jounin looked away.

"This might hurt as well. Be prepared." the older nodded his, trying to think of something else, but the pain was hard to ignore. It felt like hours before the chunin was done and was wrapping the wound in a bandage. Once the brunette was done, he looked up into the jounin's eyes, that's when Kakashi saw something in them, motherly wisdom? Iruka gave him a warm smile. "Well, that's all. Though, you should probably go to the hospital sometime." the jounin was so entranced by that smile, it made his heart flutter, and a blush run across his masked cheeks. Iruka raised an eyebrow "Are you okay Kakashi-sensei?" the older male snapped out of it.

"Y-yeah! Just fine." he stood up "Thank you for everything Iruka-sensei." Kakashi stood in the door frame, giving a smile wave before disappearing in a puff of smoke.

"Okay..." the chunin said not really believing.

* * *

 **thank you all for reading:)!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 9: You Are The Father!

"You're late Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto shouted, jumping up from the ground, pointing an accusing finger. Of course the jounin just shrugged it off.

"What's your excuse this time?" Sasuke asked dryly.

"None, I was actually talking to someone, that's why I'm late." he admitted honestly.

"Wow! You're being honest! That's a first!" Sakura said in awe.

"Hey! I can be honest! Just not around you guys..."

"Clearly." the black haired genin yawned. Kakashi sighed.

"Well, it looks like we're all a bit tired today. So how about no training, but you all better be bright and on Monday." the sensei said, walking away, with his book in hand.

"What?! You lazy old pervert!" Naruto shouted, but he knew that the sensei only blocked him out. He growled and sat on the ground in a crisscross position, arms folded over his chest, and a pout.

"Guys!" the girl said brightly "This will give us some more time to get Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei together!" Sasuke nodded.

"Oh yeah! About that!" the blonde said "I've actually come up with another one."

"Really? What is it?!" Sakura asked.

"So I was watching a drama last night-"

"Naruto, why are you watching drama's?" Sasuke asked.

"Shut up! Sometimes nothing betters on!" the black haired boy rolled his eyes "Anyway, so one of the characters was pregnant and the other character helped them and they fell in love! So, we just need to get Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei to kiss and one will get pregnant! Perfect!" the two gave him a "are you kidding me" look. "What? Isn't it the best?!"

"Naruto," Sasuke rubbed his temples "You don't get pregnant by kissing."

"You don't?!" the boy and girl let out long and hard sighs.

"Okay so, lets never let Naruto come up with the plans again." the girl mumbled, Sasuke nodded in agreement.

"Hey! My plan worked last time! Who knows! It may actually work! Watch!" he smirked as he heard the jounin walking towards them.

"Hey guys, I forgot to tell you-" Kakashi was interrupted by the blonde when Naruto jumped up.

"Kakashi-sensei! Iruka-sensei's pregnant!"

"What?!"

"And Kakashi Hatake, you are the father!" Naruto said with a big smirk, the jounin just passed out.

* * *

 **i think im funnyXD!  
**

 **anyway,**

 **hope you all enjoyed this chapter and i hope to see you all in the next:)!**

 **thank you all for reading:D!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 10: You Are Not The Father!(Thankfully)

"Somebody quick! Get the emergency porn!" Naruto said in panic as they all stood over their passed out sensei.

"Shit Naruto! Look what you did!" Sakura screeched.

"I thought it was gonna work!"

"How?!"

"When did we become the Maury Show?!" Sasuke asked.

"The day we became matchmakers!"

"That's it! No more Maury Show!" Sasuke shouted.

"What?!"

"You've been doing the "you are the father!" and "that was a lie" thing for over a month!"

"Because it's a good TV show!"

"Will you two shut up!" Sakura screamed at the two boys "We have more important things to worry about!"

"Right!" Naruto got serious, he bent down towards his sensei's face and started waving the porn book over the passed out jounin's face.

"Naruto!" Sakura shouted "Cut it out! That won't work!"

"Yes it will!" he said as he continued waving.

"Naruto...it's not working." the blonde sighed.

"Yeah, I guess you're right..."

"But I have something that will." Sasuke said cracking his knuckles "Get out of the way." Naruto nodded his head and stood back. The black haired genin took in his deep breath, closing his eyes, almost like he was building up chakra. Then, he lifted his left leg, Naruto's eyes went wide, seeing the leg move in slow monition, unable to get the words out before it was too late. Sasuke's foot hit the older mans private area and the jounin's eyes popped open, almost coming out of their sockets.

"Ow! What the mother fucking hell! Bullshit! Fuck! Fuck! I hate all you mother fucking kids! I didn't sign up for this shit! Ah! Ah! Oooh, oh my Kami..." Kakashi breathed in threw his teeth, holding his junk tightly, then looking up at the smirking genin "What the hell was that for?!" Sasuke only shrugged.

"It got you up didn't you." the copy-nin narrowed his eye.

"You fucking little-"

"Kakashi-sensei," Sakura interrupted "About Iruka-sensei, Naruto was-" that's when the silver haired male shot upright, digging his nails into his skull.

"How could I be the father?! I've never even had sex with him! Wait...was that pillow I was humping when I was drunk really him?!"

"What's sex?" Naruto asked innocently, but then got a serious after feeling the deathly daggers of Sasuke and Sakura's glares "Oh, yeah, right...the test results came out wrong, Kakashi Hatake, you are not the father."

"Thank Kami!" the jounin placed a hand over his heart "But Iruka isn't pregnant right?" all three nodded "Okay, okay..." he breathed. Then shot his attention over to the blonde "How could you even joke like that?! Are you trying to give a man a heart attack?! Where did you even hear that?!"

"The Maury Show!"

"Why are you watching the Maury Show?! You're like eleven!"

"I'm twelve and it's a good TV show!" the jounin shrugged.

"Well, can't argue with that, but on a serious note, never to that again. Ever." the blonde nodded.

"Clear as day." it went silent for a moment "But seriously...what's sex?" Kakashi cleared his throat.

"I'm glad you re-asked that question Naruto because I'll be happy to answer it! Sex is when-!" Sasuke slapped a hand over his sensei's covered mouth.

"I think he should hear the definition from someone else." Kakashi was so offended.

"But I'm piratically his father!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Sasuke said unamused.

"Just feel free to ask me any questions Naruto." the jounin said in a friendly voice. The blonde's eyebrow twitched.

"Umm...no thank you...?"

"Anyway," Sakura said, breaking the awkwardness "I've actually been thinking about how you can get Iruka-sensei." Kakashi stood up, dusting off his pants, before he could even speak, Naruto spoke for him.

"Yeah, why don't you just, I don't know, ASK HIM OUT."

"Oh yeah, that's like, a crazy idea Naruto." Sasuke agreed.

"It's not that simple..." the blonde genin gave him a face.

"Are you kidding me?"

"What?"

"Are you serious?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you telling me, that you, you, a jounin, the famous copy-nin, an ex-ANBU, is afraid to literally get rejected?! SO I'VE BEEN WASTING MY WHOLE TIME WHEN I COULD BE FINISHING "BOYS OVER FLOWERS"?!" he realized he said the last part a little bit too loud and blushed, rubbing the back of his head nervously. Everyone went silent, not really sure what too say. The copy-nin cleared his throat.

"Um, yeah, anyway, it's just been...a really, really long time that I've felt like this towards another person in so many years..." Kakashi started going down memory lane, and instantly regret it.

"Don't worry Kakashi-sensei," Sasuke said, in almost a comforting tone "We'll help you..."

"Yeah! Believe it! Even though I'm still not happy about it..." Naruto pouted and crossed his arms. The jounin let out a sigh.

"I can't believe I'm saying this but, what do you kids got in mind?"

* * *

 **thank you all for reading:)!  
**


	11. Chapter 11

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, Panic! At The Disco, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 11: Sasuke's Dark Secret!

"Don't worry Kakashi-sensei!" the blonde gave a big thumbs up "Leave it to us! Just go home and get a good-nights rest!" the jounin only sighed. Why was he trusting twelve years old's again? Who knows.

"Okay, fine, I'm leaving my love life in your hands." was all the other said before walking away.

 _'Kami, I'm a moron.'_ he thought while walking away. The team got back together and started brain storming ideas. None seemed to peek any of their interests until Sasuke started speaking.

"Wait!" the black haired genin said sharply "What about a love letter?"

"That's perfect!" Sakura smiled, Naruto rolled his eyes.

"Oh so when Mr. Hot Shot thinks of something it's "perfect!" but when I think of something it's "stupid"!"

"Yeah, because your idea was something you saw out of a stupid TV show." Sasuke responded bluntly.

"When it comes to Sasuke Uchiha saying the "Maury Show is stupid" the lie detector determined, that was a lie!"

"...That's it...I'm taking your TV..."

"Anyway!" Sakura interrupted before things got even more out of hand "Lets think of stuff to write of and present what we've come up with tomorrow. I'll bring a pen and paper. How about we meet up at the park?" the boys nodded. "Okay, see you both tomorrow!"

* * *

The next day they all arrived at the park around one-thirty and started getting to work right away. Well, not _right_ away pre say. They all forgot okay! None of them took the time to think about what to write! They all hoped at least one did! But nope! Now, at the moment, they'd only had one thing down and that was "I love you".

"Ugh! This is soo hard!" Naruto shouted, digging his nails into his skull.

"I know," Sakura agreed "And how are we going to make our handwriting look like Kakashi-sensei's?"

"I can. I copied it with my sharingan." Sasuke said like there was absolutely strange about that while taking the pen from Sakura, getting looks from his teammates, confusing him. "What?"

"Sasuke...why did copy Kakashi-sensei's handwriting?" Naruto asked. Sasuke only gave a shrug.

"Because I can, and I needed something."

"W-what?"

"A assassin to kill my brother." both Sakura and Naruto looked at each other with terrified expressions. The blonde gulped.

"D-did...did he kill him?" did he even wanna know?!

Sasuke shrugged "Don't know. I mean...he didn't come back..." the other teammates gulped, throats suddenly feeling dry. "Oh! And I have his credit card number."

"Sasuke...why do you have Kakashi-sensei's credit card number?" Sasuke shrugged again.

"Don't know, but I bought a condo in the Waterfall."

"They have condos in the Waterfall?!" Naruto asked surprised.

"I guess. I mean...I bought one."

"Can you get me one?!"

"Wait! Wait! Wait!" Sakura interrupted "So you sign checks using Kakashi's signature and pay for things by using his signature? So you're basically pretending to be Kakashi-sensei?" Sasuke nodded "Isn't that considered identity theft?" Sasuke shrugged. All thought about it for a moment before focusing back on the letter. "Anyway! I thought about somethings to write! Lets get started!"

"Speaking of Kakashi-sensei," Naruto thought aloud while watching his teammates write the letter "I wonder where he is right now..."

* * *

 ***With Kakashi-sensei*  
**

"When did I buy a fucking condo in the Waterfall?! And in the Cloud?!" he shouted as he looked at his credit card bill. It just kept getting worse and worse. The jounin just passed out in the middle of his kitchen.

* * *

 **thank you all for reading :)!  
**


	12. Chapter 12

**Warnings: attempt at humor, mentions of mpreg, KotetsuxIzumo, GenmaxRaidou, Panic! At The Disco, characters maybe OOC, motherly Iruka.**

Chapter 12: The Reaction!

"Does it look good?" Sakura asked, holding the letter.

"Good as it'll get." Naruto mumbled, hands folded behind his head.

"I don't know..." the pink haired girl felt uneasy "The handwriting is so sloppy! How will Iruka-sensei even read this?!"

"That's how he writes." Sasuke said simply. Sakura sighed, shoulders began to slouch.

"Maybe this isn't such a good idea..."

* * *

The plan is in action! They placed the letter casually with the other mission reports while Iruka-sensei was out of the room so when the sensei was sorting through them he'd fined the letter! It was perfect! Even though Naruto did knock over an entire stack of mile high papers in the process of trying to hide the letter in the middle, it will still workout though! The team sat on a branch that had a clear view of their sensei sitting at the mission desk. He was the only one in the room too! This was gonna be great!

They all gasped like high school girls when they saw him pick up the letter with a questioning look. The brunette opened up the envelop which contained the letter, team 7 held their breath as Iruka slowly slid the letter out. The sensei read over it with eyes so thin as he glared down, all bit their nails. Without even a second thought, Iruka closed his eyes, crumpled the paper and threw it over his shoulder into the trash.

"Stupid pervert..." he muttered before going back to sorting the mission reports.

"WHHHAAAATT!" all three in the tree branch shouted at the top of their lungs then falling backwards onto the ground. Naruto's eyebrow twitched.

"WHY IS THIS SO HARD?!"

* * *

 **thank you all for reading!  
**


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